Expect the expected
The second Idol semi-final has come and gone. My thoughts: The girls did decently, much better than the boys of the Semi Final the First; though that's kind of like saying you'd rather eat a piece of cake than a piece of crap- a godawfully homogenised, cliched and generally undeserving of 15 minutes of Idol fame (except for the odd WEIGHT CRISIS article in the local gossip rag) piece of crap. At least I could differentiate between the girls without having to refer to their costumes.
This sentiment, however, leaves me with little material to play with. I can't completely trash the girls voices, as that would make me a bit of a hypocrite; even worse, an Idol hypocrite - one of the lowliest labels possible.
And I can't pick on their costumes, as they didn't have the nafftastic conformity of the Night of the Scarves. That, and I'll probably be accused of being sexist. Even worse, I'll be on par with Kyle 'S&M Throat Fetish' Sandilands, who did go down that hazy path in commenting on Tarisai's pants, laying on several blatant subtextual hints of weight issues, something I'm sure Kyle will be familiar with (i.e. HE'S FAT!). Now there's an Idol hypocrite for you.
But I'll do my best. Prepare to be disappointed.
The second Idol semi-final has come and gone. My thoughts: The girls did decently, much better than the boys of the Semi Final the First; though that's kind of like saying you'd rather eat a piece of cake than a piece of crap- a godawfully homogenised, cliched and generally undeserving of 15 minutes of Idol fame (except for the odd WEIGHT CRISIS article in the local gossip rag) piece of crap. At least I could differentiate between the girls without having to refer to their costumes.
This sentiment, however, leaves me with little material to play with. I can't completely trash the girls voices, as that would make me a bit of a hypocrite; even worse, an Idol hypocrite - one of the lowliest labels possible.
And I can't pick on their costumes, as they didn't have the nafftastic conformity of the Night of the Scarves. That, and I'll probably be accused of being sexist. Even worse, I'll be on par with Kyle 'S&M Throat Fetish' Sandilands, who did go down that hazy path in commenting on Tarisai's pants, laying on several blatant subtextual hints of weight issues, something I'm sure Kyle will be familiar with (i.e. HE'S FAT!). Now there's an Idol hypocrite for you.
But I'll do my best. Prepare to be disappointed.
Speaking of nothing to do with winners, the aformentioned Tarisai was voted into the next round, as well as 17 year old Lana. Tarisai's inclusion was a no brainer - even if some viewers didn't like her, her voice, which was so loud that I think that the producers needn't bother giving her a mic, would have still echoed in viewers' ears as they blindly poked at their mobile phones. However, I'm not sure if she's aoing to appeal to the main voting demographics like some of the other contestants.
And that's where Lana comes in. Being the precocious 17 year old, there was no surprise in her getting through, despite a performance which was almost as weak as a Starbucks 'coffee' or an insult from Kyle the Cock. Performing Stacy Ann Ferguson's Big Girls Don't Cry didn't do her any favours in my eyes (but Ferguson's lack of talent is for another day). But clearly, she's fancied by both major voting blocs: the TBs ("OMG SHES A QTIE!!1!!") and the Horny-Teen-Males ("*thwap* *thwap* *thwap*")
What irked me the most about her inclusion is that it further pushes the fact that Idol is basically all about image. Yes, I know it's Idol, we're talking about. I know that singing is the least important aspect of this singing contest. But the whole image thing was pushed by all the judges, who each said in one form or another 'Awww. You're so adorable. I just want to gobble you up' etc.
On that note, Kyle revealed again what a twat he is, by saying to Lana that her performance should have been "sexier." This is a 17 year old girl we're talking about here. Yet Kyle wants this underaged contestant to be "sexier." You just have to question his motives. However legal eagles, I'm not going to specifically mention any ideas of inappropriate behaviour which may or may not end happily. I'm just saying the last thing we need is another Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera in her 'Dirrty' days hogging up the charts, let alone one from the factory of Idol.
*remembers Xtina's Dirrty phase*
*throws up*
It's a shame Cheray didn't get through. Her performance was respectable. Her particular stylings, however, would mainly appeal to an older demographic, and we all know older Idol voters don't actually exist; they're just like the Sandman or the Tooth Fairy (though last time I checked, the Easter Bunny was just about to be elected as CEO of a major Legal Firm, I won't remind you which one, as I'm sure you all know of this very common fact)
This is turning out to be a very typical series of Idol, and I can already tell that by the end of the series, I'll be shaking my fist at the TV when they pick the least desering winner. Despite that, I'll still tune in to the next two semi-finals with my 'Surprised' face on just in case someone at
*Yes, I have been reading 1984, thank you for asking.
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